After some delay, here is this week’s edition of the Goldilocks Gazette, named by me after only one person participated in the naming poll (kudos to Eri).

As usual, if you find an interesting bit of news, post it here so we can see it, or just add your opinion to the thread.

 

Science and Technology

 

Urban plants’ role as carbon sinks ‘underestimated’

Wow, more plants on the planet counteract global warming.  Who knew?  Still, seems that growing rooftop gardens could be a rewarding experience.  Cleaner air, greener scenery – not to mention the potential for city-wide food fights.  Just watch out for the hoods going pumpkin chucking.

 

Last shuttle era spacewalk is over

It’s sad to see the old workhorse go – and to celebrate, they’re fixing that pesky pump.  NASA must be as hesitant as I am to get rid of them, so they’ve extended the mission by a day.  This gave President Obama sufficient time to dial the guys for pizza.  +1 Coolness for him.

 

World News

 

United States

 

Bradley Manning visit limits ‘break UN probe rules’

The United Nations champions Captain Obvious with their new statement.  What strikes me as funny about this is that they waited 6 whole months before they announced this.  First they politely ask for information about the whole case, expecting that they’ll answer truthfully and politely.

Y’know, something always struck me about the UN as being completely and utterly powerless.  They have very little soldiers, almost no political power, and don’t really make a difference in anything outside of financial and economic matters.  Plus, they can’t exactly vindicate any major nations in their little club, ’cause they provide all the backbone for the thing. I’m pretty sure that if they tried to pull the plug on the US, they’d just leave; and the whole thing would collapse like the old League of Nations.  This gives the US somewhat the presence and power of a schoolyard bully when it comes to international matters.  Surely, some of the other member nations could unite to do something about this?  There’s the European Union (a economic and political union), and The Shanghai Cooperation Organisation, which provide a collected security force for their member nations as well.  I didn’t include NATO because A) the US holds MAJOR power over that, and B) they’re dying like the dodo.

 

CIA’s ‘fake vaccine drive’ to get bin Laden’s family DNA

Un-fucking-acceptable.  Sure, some people might think “Oh, but without this, how could we confirm it’s him?”  The guy’s pretty fucking hard to miss.

President Obama urged to investigate torture claims

The fact that more than half the world has to badger the guy to do this is bad enough, but dragging it out?  That’s just plain criminal.  We know the guy was up to his nose in bad leadership decisions, bad intel, bad grammar.  We know he allowed these Geneva violations to continue with his knowledge and support.  Why wait?  gather your evidence and lock ‘em up!  Or did the evidence for their case “disappear” like those WMDs?

 

Obama holds talks with Dalai Lama despite China protests

Eh, fuck the PRC.  What are they going to do, stop selling us crap?  Because we’d be soooooo badly hurt economically if they did, and – wait, we would be.  Shit.

 

United Kingdom

Gordon Brown attacks New International tactics

When will the criticism stop?  Yes, these guys are douchebags.  Now stop talking and start doing something.  Y’know, more than just some probes and asking a few questions.

 

Royal Navy tracking WWII mine off Essex coast

Another one of those things.  Seriously, we’ve got thousands of unstable crap left over from the wars {which were almost a CENTURY ago) getting more rusty, unstable and ready to go off at any moment nowadays.  There’s the live warheads at Ironbottom sound, the mustard gas containers offthe coast of Europe and the US, the dumping of radioactive material everywhere on the planet – every day we become a little more like Eaarth.

 

Russia

 

Russian neo-Nazis jailed for life over27 race murders

What.  The.  Hell.  Were these guys thinking.  Seriously, you don’t support the Nazis in Russia It’s one of those things people from the loony bin have enough sense to avoid doing.  The Russians; they have a VERY personal attachment to WWII, and each and every Russian family to this day has a member you can trace back down the line which was lost in Hitler’s Operation Barbarossa.  These guys’ll be lucky to survive a day in the joint without getting “disappeared”

I almost feel sorry for them.  They’re so stupid it’s like watching a few dogs run into traffic (that is, after they chased all the cats and non-pure-breed mutts out into it first.  But of course, that little malevolent side of me says “they must burn”

 

Japan

 

Japan ‘to continue’ Arctic whaling

….

After all this recent ruckus about global warming, and the extinctions of multiple species worldwide, the people who hosted the Kyoto Protocol signings (which noone payed attention to), decides to kill more whales for meat and blubber.  Never mind the fact that sonar and artificial noise created by humans are screwing them up, let’s go pick ‘em off while they’re easy targets!  Because nothing says manly like harpooning some large disoriented mammals from half a mile away.

 

Other News

 

Son of Coronado Mansion owner dies in fall

First his kid falls off a roof, then the guy’s girlfriend is found dead in the mansion.  Wow.  Sounds like something out of a mystery/horror novel.  Guy must have some really bad luck…..

Woman accused of cutting husband’s penis, putting it down garbage disposal

Is just fell out of the chair laughing when I saw this.  Ladies and gentlemen, the next Laurena Bobbit.  Seriously, it’s like the Darwin Awards; you just can’t help but wonder how the hell these things happened.

 

That’s all for this week.  Thank you, and good morning.