I got used to being “part of the scenery” at meetings with venture capitalists, but then I wasn’t the one who had to deal with them either, and I liked it that way.

Of course, in my neck of the woods the billionaire is probably that guy in the Bermuda shorts and t-shirt standing next to you at the SF shelf at Borders. Your comfortable dress code would fit right in.

I still have a hell of a time figuring out how to tie a tie, and have never worn a tux since my prom. Most of the “upper crust” around here seem to be in the same boat.

I lean on my wife at social functions, since she remembers names and “farleyfile” stuff a lot better than I do. She’s the social flower of the family.

Which was fine. It wasn’t a disaster, I got to listen to people who were experiencing the business cycle, who would be in New York for Christmas and some in London for New Years.

I may have underdone the dress. I was neat, clean, and casual for most things, everyone else except for the one guy dressed like me was in black.

I suspect the hostess would have liked me to help clean up, but she’s the type who counts her silverware and doesn’t use a dishwasher on the stuff we ate off and with. And I wanted out.

So, I’ve done that. A warm body in a cold seat, and it was fine. Wasn’t any more out of place than any of the “orphans” we used to have at Thanksgiving, that is anyone who didn’t have someplace else to go or wanted to have dinner with us.

Thanks again.

We all drop our drawers to defecate. Some are Ralph Lauren drawers, some are Fruit of the Loom.

When I was in beauty school, at a mere 21, the instructors always gave me the officer’s wives as clientele.(We were stationed at Eglin AFB.) My teacher said I was never intimidated by rank…I wasn’t….because…

I was a nurse’s aide as a teen ager. I took rectal temperatures on all the patients I was assigned. I emptied bedpans. Everyone looks the same in a hospital setting: vulnerable.
Valuable lesson that will stay with me until the day I cease to exist.

Money never makes the man. Character does.

A person of honor and integrity comes in all colors, all stations of life. Hold your head up Bowser. You are as good as they are.
Fox felt the way you are feeling. He leaned on me to *pave* the way at social functions. I talk easily and can get anyone to open up and come off their high horse.

No one knows but you Bowser how you are feeling. You will not be exposed….unless you allow it.

You show respect for your hosts and gratitude for their hospitality by being neat and well groomed, and by showing you made an effort to make yourself presentable, as you might for any public occasion.

But you refuse to dress up for them, or even to “dress for dinner”, in the fully formal sense of the term (black tie, tux, studs, etc). You should dress as if you were being invited to the White House, or being interviewed by Jay Leno, or picking up a young lady for dinner and a show. Respectable, but not subservient.

That is all they, or anyone, deserves.

As for the conversation, don’t worry about it. No one wants to make an ass of themselves, and everyone wants to make a good impression, but WHO you impress or offend should be irrelevant. I have found that people like that, outside their particular specialty, are rarely very deep or interesting. The ones that are will be a delight to talk to, and will delight in those qualities in you–if you do indeed possess them.

If you’re like me, you’ll much rather disappoint someone you don’t respect than someone you do, regardles sof their station or influence.