http://www.cnn.com/2016/05/06/politics/trump-announces-vp-pick-thompson/index.html

(CNN)- Once again presumptive Republican nominee Donald Trump has managed to catch political pundits completely by surprise. Just days ago Trump stated that he would wait until the Republican National Convention to announce his choice for running mate, but today in Charleston West Virginia in front of a standing room only crowd at the Charleston Civic Center, Trump announced relative newcomer Alana Thompson as his pick.

Trump started the rally with a targeted message geared towards miners and the coal industry.
“I am thinking about the miners all over this country. We’re going to put the miners back to work,” Trump said, calling on the miners who were in the crowd of thousands to stand up. “We are going to get those mines open. Oh, coal country. What they have done.”

“We need to show those folks in Washington that we are serious about miners-That is what I have decided to do! Ladies and gentlemen I give you the next vice-president of the United States- Alana Thompson!”

The crowd roared loudly as Alana Thompson took the stage to stand next to Trump.

Trump introduces VP pick Alana Thompson while molesting flag with his stubby little fingers

Like Donald Trump, Ms. Thompson (more commonly known as ‘Honey Boo Boo’) has no previous experience in politics, but has starred in a popular reality television series. Ms. Thompson, at age 11, would be the youngest vice president in American political history.
However, Constitutional scholar and Harvard Law Professor Laurence Tribe says her young age presents a problem. “The constitution clearly states that the age requirement for president – and also vice president- is 35 years old or older. But then, the constitution says a lot of things. These people don’t seem to read it, so who cares what I think?”

Trump campaign strategist Paul Manafort called Trump’s choice of Ms. Thompson a ‘game-changer’. “At first when Donald discussed his plan to pick her, I was skeptical and advised against it, but you know Donald- he’s his own man. I think its clear from the reaction of the crowd tonight he knows what he is doing. Alana has incredible name recognition among Donald’s fans. Everyone has been saying that the Donald needs to start being more presidential- I think Alana brings a sense of gravitas that was sorely lacking in the ticket.”

Asked about the concerns and constitutional questions over Ms. Thompson’s age, Manafort brushed them off. “Look, everyone should know by now that Donald isn’t going to be stopped by some old piece of paper, and neither are his supporters. Look at how these coal country folks cheered when Donald told them his vice presidential pick was a minor!”

Manafort also dismissed concerns about whether Ms. Thompson could handle the grueling campaign schedule and the upcoming debates with the Democratic nominees. “That won’t be an issue, we have got her Mama June with us on the campaign to keep her spirits and energy up. Once you give Alana some ‘go-go’ juice she can keep up with anyone. As for the debates, half the time she is even more incoherent than the Donald- so no one will know if she said the right things or not.”

When asked to comment on her new position, Ms. Thompson was philosophical. “ I wish I had some extra fingers so I could grab me more cheese balls.”


Trump poses at a photo-op with his brain-trust after the rally