The technician said, “there’s an artifact on the image. Do you have anything in your shirt pocket?” They had me take my shirt off and turn the pocket inside out. There was nothing there. Then I remembered I was shot with a bb gun when I was a kid. It’s still in there above my rib. I thought it was just scar tissue but there’s a perfect sphere on the image under the scar.

Bulging disk. Traction therapy is next.

Postponing the hernia surgery until Winter. Summer’s our busy season and I can’t deal with a six week recovery. I thought it was supposed to be 2-3 weeks but I keep hearing “6″.

I used to think that I preferred dying before my wife, that she deserved a few more years of leisure and security on the insurance money after I was gone, and I was so proud I was able to leave that for her. Now I’m not so sure. Maybe I’m just flattering myself, but I think she’ll need me much more than I’ll need her, and my going first will make her life much more difficult and lonely than mine would be if I were left alone instead. I hope she is spared that. It would be a kindness to her if I was the survivor instead. Someday she will know she is close to death and I really need to be there to comfort her. I think I have convinced myself I can handle that moment alone, but I don’t want her to do so without me. Yeah, I know, its morbid, but mortality forces you to face these issues, doesn’t it?

We are all, each one of us, at the very center of the observable universe. No matter who we are or what we’ve done, no one else really gives a shit. They have troubles of their own. We are completely on our own, totally alone, in a random, chaotic and indifferent reality. Perhaps a parent, or a spouse, or a child may really care about us, or we care about them, but even they can be taken away from us without warning.

I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop…Still, I’ve managed to cross two items off my bucket list: I witnessed both a total solar eclipse and the release of the Mueller Report. And only one was a complete disappointment. I’ve missed a lot, too; I’ve never been in prison, or in combat, or desperately hungry, near death, or afraid, or in pain. I have never been overwhelmed by grief. I’ve never been divorced, had children or run a business, or discovered anything wonderful and unknown about the universe, or done anything of lasting significance or value to others.

Still, I have seen and done things of great wonder and beauty, things I am still astonished at and that I think about every day, times and places I will treasure in my memory until the day I die. As long as I am alive and conscious, those things will forever be part of the universe.

I had a sore back for a month and for the last two weeks really bad sciatica pain. A shot of Toradol and a 5 day course of steroids didn’t help. Just gonna wait it out.

Been losing hearing in one ear for awhile. It cost $250 for them to tell me that. They wanted me to get an MRI because there’s an 8-12% chance it could be a growth in my brain pressing on a nerve. I’ll take my chances.

I turn 56 next month and 6 days before, I go in for hernia surgery. Yay!

I see RL hasn’t been posting lately. I hope all is well with him but the chances of a multi-faceted conversation happening has greatly increased. If such a thing is desired.

But on a happier note, I’m heading over to OT to post some thoughts about superheroes.

Yeah, I have no doubt this sort of administrative foul-up happens with socialized medicine too, but I can see it isn’t just restricted to it either. One more bit of advice, if you’re going to have a medical emergency, don’t have it late in the week. Nothing gets done on weekends. The hospitals may be open, but no one else is. The telephone ‘bots never rest, but they never have anything useful to say, either.

Good news from the transportation department, my automotive emergency turned out to be a broken motor mount and not a busted gearbox, so it has already been repaired at a cost of a mere several hundred $, not several thousand as I feared.
My bum leg seems to have fixed itself too, so I am able to take care of the old lady efficiently.

Everything finally seems to be under control after a week of confusion and helplessness. I’ll be in touch. And thanks for your concern. I think we’re going to binge on Game of Thrones for a while and get caught up.

On the plus side, a cane can knock a red hat off a head quite easily….