I’ve taken the usual “keep busy” advice, I try to keep up the domestic maintenance and the endless administrative bullshit that goes on after a death. The house is cleaner than its been in ages, and I have thrown myself into staying on top of things, trying to stay ahead of household chores rather than putting them off. I’ve started exercising regularly again after a long hiatus, and I am eating all my vegetables–no matter how much I hate them.

I’m doing OK, really. I miss my old, dear friend terribly, but it isn’t unbearable. Still the house is full of reminders, every day I seem to stumble onto one unexpectedly and I am devastated, if only momentarily. What I haven’t done yet is started living the rest of my life. Once this period of transition and adjustment is over, I’m going to have to start working on some Project, some Plan.

In the meantime, I still have my ringside seat to history. No matter how this election turns out, I know I’ll live long enough to see it play out. Whether Trumpism is stamped out forever, or our country and the world slides into barbarism and chaos, (or something in between) I have a pretty good chance I’m going to be able to watch it all go down. I may not feel this way all the time, but if I objectively examine the way my life is going right now, I am pretty much forced to admit things are going pretty well for me. I am still waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Thanks for your concern, Zoners. I appreciate, no, I treasure your love. But I am doing OK, I am not the only human being in the history of he universe who has lost a loved one. I will survive. My ultimate crisis is still in the future. Don’t worry about me, you all have problems of your own.